By Joseph Walter
Here at XCOM, we have a collection of the world's best operatives, trained in xeno-combat and given access to the deadliest weapons and most protective armor ever made by mankind.
Meet your team.
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By Joseph WalterWith the alien invasion slowly-but-surely starting to take its toll on the collective psyche of the world, XCOM will need to take the fight to these dangerous creatures and eliminate the threat. Here at XCOM, we have a collection of the world's best operatives, trained in xeno-combat and given access to the deadliest weapons and most protective armor ever made by mankind. Meet your team. JORGE HOWARD, RookieThe world has not been kind to Mr. Howard. As a youth, he braved the dangerous Trump Wall and escaped the treacherous Mexican wastes to make a new life in America. After joining the American military in a coup to overthrow the dangerous despot, Trump, the aliens invaded and Jorge was selected to become part of the XCOM Project. DArren Wilson, RookieA successful, but reclusive, author living out his days traveling, Darren was one of the first to experience the alien invasion first hand. In a botched abduction attempt, Darren's campsite was sieged by two creatures, at which point he purportedly proclaimed "welcome to the slaughterhouse, bitch" and proceeded to pummel the two xenos to death. Shortly after joining the XCOM project, he was sent on its inaugural mission. Although he achieved no kills during that sortie, he's confident that record will change. STefan Delgado, Squaddie (2 kills)After Trump declared himself "Eternal Dictator" and led a rabid coup against the former American government, Stefan was one of the first to reject the new order. Using a love for comic book heroes, his approach involved vigilante strikes against Trump's most trusted Grand Moffs. In the years following the overthrow of the "Eternal Dictator," Stefan's combat skill caused him to be a shoe-in for the XCOM Project. Michael Romei, RookieA former film composer, the recent "abduction mania" began to cause a paranoia that he could not shake. Along with his arsenal of guitars and keyboards, he slowly built one of firearms. After the first abduction was clearly caught crystal-clear on camera, he joined a local, anti-xeno militia. Before long, his skill (and musical repertoire) caught the eyes and ears of the XCOM Project. STEVE GRODZKI, SQuaddie (1 Kill)Squaddie Grodzki was one of the first members of the XCOM team. Years before the abduction epidemic, Steve's research and insight into the xeno-threat was unparalleled. Due to his wide range of combat and survival skills, he helped create the anti-xeno combat maneuvers that each member of XCOM is trained in to this day. When the XCOM Project was officially activated due to the abduction epidemic, Steve was on the very first combat mission, where he achieved a solitary kill. The first of many, without a doubt. Rachel Callender, RookieWhile pursuing further education, Rachel was visiting her ancestral castle in Scotland when the first tangible alien abduction cause came to light in North America. Only days later did Scotland face its extraterrestrial fears with their own case of an attempted, dreaded abduction. Rachel, along with locals, entered Castle Callander, barricaded it, and fought off the encroaching beings until they fled. Her quick-thinking, fearlessness and leadership ability earned her a welcome spot in XCOM's barracks. Joseph Prescott, RookieNot unlike Mr. Wilson, Joseph Prescott earned his living through the art of the written word. In an ironic twist of fate, whilst completing the final installment of a sci-fi series in which a detective in a colonized solar system discovered an impending extra-galactic threat, Mr. Prescott bore witness to an alien scurrying through the streets of Philadelphia, directly out his window. His police report was disregarded as "preposterous," but as more reports began to flood in, he was vindicated. He soon chose to put down the pen and ink and pick up an assault rifle with high-caliber magazines with XCOM. Joseph McCauley, RookieA gold-medal Olympic wrestler, Joseph McCauley was increasingly disturbed by reports of suspicious beings in his neighborhood. While training for the upcoming games, the unthinkable happened: Every person in his development, including his wife and children, disappeared without a trace. Swearing revenge, he signed up for the military. Before he could sent to boot camp, he was stopped by an XCOM agent and inducted into the secretive Project. Full-Nelsons have taken a backseat to frag grenades and rifles, but McCauley is still a force to be reckoned with. Joseph Walter, Squaddie (3 Kills)Actor-turned-activist, Joseph Walter had been paranoid about the extraterrestrial threat for years. Constantly bemoaning the world governments for not "doing enough" to put planetary defenses in place while instead squabbling over pointless terrestrial disputes, Mr. Walter caught the eye of the XCOM Project, who hurriedly inducted him. Deployed on the inaugural combat mission, Joseph Walter achieved three kills, but suffered battle-wounds in the process, sending him to the hospital for 6 days.
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By Joseph WalterAfter the holiday hiatus, "Weekly Soundcheck" is back! Because of the wait, I wanted to do something a little special, so we're counting down the top 10 classic Sonic the Hedgehog music tracks. The Sonic series was a staple of the SEGA Genesis in terms of both gameplay and musical mastery. Each game managed to put out a unique soundtrack that had a very specific "Sonic Sound," while remaining exceptionally eclectic, never shying away from unusual stylistic inspirations. It was tough to narrow these down, as I had to cut out a few of my favorites, but I wanted to show off the songs that I felt properly exemplified the full spectrum of the "Sonic Sound." I wonder if any of your favorites made the list! :) 10. Star Light Zone (Sonic 1) One of the "dreamy" tunes in the franchise that I'm so fond of, "Star Light Zone's" music is an outstanding accompaniment to the starry-skied city that the Zone is home to. While its orchestration is relatively simple, the gentle instruments it uses to lead into the more robust horn section do a great job of setting the scene. 9. Emerald Hill Zone (Sonic 2)The song for the opening level in a Sonic game is typically the most beloved, perhaps due to the fact it's the one you hear every time you start the game. Either way, nearly every Sonic delivers a memorable tune that sets the tone for that entry. In this case, "Emerald Hill" has a desperate feeling. While the song itself is jovial on the surface, certain passages add a dire layer and remind the player that saving the lives of Sonic's friends is at stake. What will become a theme throughout a lot of these tracks is the funky bass-line that only a Genesis could provide with its weird, warble-y sound chip. 8. Chemical Plant Zone (Sonic 2)My favorite level in Sonic 2, "Chemical Plant Zone" is memorable musically and otherwise. Remarkably, despite being only the second stage of the game, we're treated to a theme fitting for Robotnik's fortress. Somewhat jazzy saxophone sequences and solos are a great accompaniment to the forward-marching groove of the main sequence, with those awesome organ hits. It oozes a sinister threat, much like the goopy blue chemicals that course through the veins of this industrialized plant, or the ever-rising pink water that has drowned many a hedgehog. 7. Green Hill Zone (Sonic 1)While Sonic 1's soundtrack is certainly legendary on its own accord, it's core music simply doesn't stack up very well against its later brethren compositionally. "Green Hill Zone" stands the test of time though, with that same desperation amidst the joy that "Emerald Hill" has. While the instruments used in it are early by Genesis standards, you can see how they're uniquely implemented to pioneer the "Sonic Sound," despite the system's limitations, creating a song that stands out among its peers, Sonic series or otherwise. 6. Aquatic Ruin Zone (Sonic 2)"Aquatic Ruin Zone" is one of my favorites in terms of music and aesthetic. The song has a very slight calypso feel, but it doesn't take prominence. Instead, the theme exudes a layer of mystery (fitting for the locale of sinking ruins in an expansive jungle) and beautiful thrill. My favorite nuanced element are the clap samples, especially when they are intentionally delayed. Once again, the bass-line nearly upstages the entire tune, but this time with a much less warble-y instrument. 5. Miniboss (Sonic & Knuckles)Sonic & Knuckles provides an outstanding mini-boss theme that not only blows away the Michael Jackson effort of Sonic 3 but even S&K's own Robotnik and final boss themes. The tingly threat of the intro, to the double-bass-drum-fueled hook at :17 that symbolizes confrontation, "Miniboss" adds an unexpected level of heroism and peril to the thrill of the duel. 4. Sky Sanctuary (Sonic 3 & Knuckles)"Sky Sanctuary" is an easy example of how not every Sonic theme needs to be on the fast-paced action spectrum, nor fully in the relaxed dreamy world of the "Star Light Zone." This Zone's theme effectively illustrates the spacious beauty of the sky while doing an excellent job of teasing the future triumph of beating the game, although not without the uncertainty and hardships represented at :32, of which there will be many (like all Sonic games in their final levels). However, the majority of the song live up to the promise of the word "Sanctuary" in the title, offering a slight, peaceful respite. 3. Blue Sphere (Sonic 3 & Knuckles)If you may recall, I can't get enough of the dream-like aura of this the particular piece of music. "Blue Sphere" is a pure joy all around, equal parts exciting, calming and mysterious. When it speeds up (which is what happens in-game during the bonus stage that it accompanies) all of those aspects are amplified with an injection of an ever-growing thrill. 2. Flying Battery Zone Act 2 (Sonic 3 & Knuckles)Sonic 3 and Sonic & Knuckles introduced the idea of the main theme of a Zone's first Act getting a remix for its second, which was pretty neat. While "Flying Battery Zone Act 1" is memorable in its own-right, "Act 2" is an exceptional embellishment. The main lick's background horns provide a palpable militaristic menace, and the claps greatly accentuate the thrilling dangers as you blast-process your way through the deadly flying fortress. This particular song is so high up on this list because it does an outstanding job of providing memorable, exciting music while perfectly setting the scene of the stage without being too literal. While other tracks accomplish this as well, they just don't do it to the level that the "Flying Battery Zone," or to the level that its "Act 2" continuation brings to the table. 1. Lava Reef Zone Act 1 & 2 (Sonic 3 & Knuckles)"Flying Battery Zone Act 2" may be perfectly exciting and scene-setting, but it's still fairly standard Sonic faire. This is where the ultimate musical Sonic triumph comes into play: The Lava Reef Zone, Acts 1 and 2. These two tracks take everything that works in the "Sonic Sound" and pushes them as far as possible into the spectrum of what the "Sonic Sound" stands for. Because of this, we get two pieces of music that represent the aesthetics of the Zone they accompany, evolve the "Sonic Sound" and provide a memorable, aurally satisfying soundscape. Moody, vaguely sinister, and with an air of perilous, exploratory curiosity, "Act 1" delivers a flawless accompaniment to the cavernous, glowing, molten realm of the Lava Reef. Pay close attention to the awesome bass-line, especially at :22 and the musical climax at :30. "Lava Reef Zone Act 2's" theme (which also accompanies the "Hidden Palace Zone" where the Emeralds are held in S3&K) reflects the dramatic change of the Lava Reef between the first and second Acts. What was once an actively volcanic zone has now cooled and calmed, leaving a mere smoldering glimmer in the now nearly-dark blue cavern. The accompanying music ups the mystery element to a new high, with a healthy dose of desperation added for good measure. The aura of peril is now more poignant, despite it being more subtle. Perhaps the most incredible element of the "Act 2" theme is that, much like how "Act 1" is a major departure from the typical Sonic tune, "Act 2" is a major departure from "Act 1," despite the same skeleton! Although there are plenty of reasons as to why the "Lava Reef Zone" should reign supreme in the realm of Sonic music, the level of unique composition within the two themes when compared to the rest of the Genesis franchise, and the sheer amount of creativity between the two renditions of the same theme between the "Acts" are enough reason for the top honor, even without commenting on how perfectly they mesh with the aura, aesthetic and gameplay. The early Sonic the Hedgehog games were exceptional for more than a few reasons, and the music, along with the "Sonic Sound," are certainly among the main ones. As I mentioned at the start, I strongly believe these ten (eleven, if we're being honest) represent the best of the best in terms of Sonic music, whether it be from composition, the unique aura each commands, their ability to symbolically match the struggles of the gameplay, or a combination of all of the above. If you felt I've missed out on outstanding track or two, feel free to let me know in the comments! (Keep in mind, though, that narrowing down the list was terribly difficult, so one of your favorites may have missed the cut by a centimeter! That's how tight my guidelines were!) By C.C.This is the first of a series of poems that guest writer C.C. was kind enough to provide. She's a fantastic poet and tackles contemporary issues with sharp words. Enjoy! Don't you see the clear wall? The invisible wall...you know, the one that follows all? Come one come all! Look at the invisible wall! People grin and gossip, "wow isn't that a clear wall?" Innocent children express in protest, "Mommy, Daddy, what is the invisible wall? I cannot see the clear, untainted wall." With an inquisitive chuckle, the man with the exceptionally transparent wall gaily replies "why it's our number one job to clean our walls. Come one come all I will show you how to clean your walls." Fake smiles, meaningless conversations, empty emotions, abandon individuality, engage in reproduction, adopt societal norms, and superficially enjoy life. That's all. That's all. Now you know how to maintain a clear wall. C.C. is a graduate of Montclair State University with a bachelors in English and a masters in the art of teaching. Writing from raw emotion has been a secret passion of hers up until this past year. The style of writing strays away from conventional poetry and encompasses a vignette component if a label needs to occur. She continues to write weekly and resides outside of NYC. To see more of her work, follow her raw_writings page on Instagram. By Joseph WalterDear Commanders, I know it's been some time, but all preparations are nearly in place to get our coordinated defense of Earth started! I had asked the interested parties where our XCOM Base should be located, but thought it would be best to ask again with a legitimate poll, which you'll find below. Our options are... 1) North America: All aircraft and aircraft weapons cost 50% less to purchase, build and maintain. 2) Europe: Laboratories and Workshops cost about 50% less to build and maintain. 3) Asia: All projects in the Foundry and the Officer Training School cost 50% less. 4)South America: Autopsies and interrogations are completed instantly. 5) Africa: Monthly XCOM funding increased by 30% As I previously mentioned, I typically go for North America, as the lowered cost of interceptors and satellites can go along way to curbing panic and striking first against the malevolent invaders. But the choice is not mine. It's ours. And now, a more pressing matter: The day of the week that works best for the majority of us. Yes, time will be an issue, but we'll tackle that when the... time... comes. I'm aiming for maybe one or two hour-long sessions a week, but we'll see adapt to the needs of the Council (you guys!) Lastly, if you know anyone else who might be interested in joining in on this destined romp, feel free to let them know about it! By Joseph WalterSince my first "Photo Gallery" post was unusually popular, I felt it was time for a "part two." And, in a shocking twist, the photos for this round will be the antithesis of my infamous light-at-night obsession, and, instead, will be shots from the sunlit hours. As always, I don't consider myself an artist or even a photographer, and these shots are nothing more than the product of a fun hobby. That said, if you happen to enjoy them, I do sell prints for $5, and they come with free short stories! The first of many pictures taken in Hawaii, "Valor" was shot in the USS Arizona Memorial in Pearl Harbor. If you ever get the chance to visit, please do. It's a serene, humbling place. This was taken at the Dole plantation in Hawaii. It was a fantastic, gorgeous and peaceful little place where you can take a short train ride and explore these luscious gardens. Nothing too exciting about the picture, but I wanted to be able to convey at least a semblance of what it was like to be surrounded by all the colorful foliage! This was taken while camping on an island in Lake George, NY. On this particular island, my family and I came across a bunch of these slimy little guys. I took great care to avoid stepping on them and enjoyed watching them slide around and hang out with one-another. It was cool seeing these small, peaceful folks, and I hope to see them again next time I visit! Lake George is a serene, quiet and stunning locale. Camping on one of the islands only enhances these aspects. I loved the colors during the cloudier days, with the deep-ice blues enhancing the gorgeous greens on the distant shores. I was lucky enough to catch the clouds flattening on the top of the mountain, too. Nothing much to say other than that this is a typical sunset at Lake George, NY. I was lucky to have such a wide shot of the lake and the mountain ranges. One last shot of Hawaii. This was a secluded waterfall next to a dense jungle. A small, unkempt road lead to the cliff where I took this shot. I had never seen a natural waterfall before, at least not quite like this, and I wanted to capture the feeling of being surrounded by nature and the gushing water to the point where it was as if you could feel the moisture in the air and hear the cascading water.
By Joseph WalterThis past Halloween season, I reviewed a series of Halloween specials and... okay, so I only wrote one this year (hey, at least I made up for it with a ton of Christmas content). The review in question was of a Season 2 Power Rangers episode called "Zedd's Monster Mash." The episode was typical, mediocre Season 2 faire, but there was one aspect that continued to puzzle me since its original airing. That mystery being who and what the hell is this thing, and what in God's name does this headstone say: I'm happy to say that after so many puzzled years, I have the answer, and so much more. But first, a little history: Power Rangers, as some of you may know, isn't an entirely American show. Fight scenes and costumed footage are taken from a long-running Japanese series with the blanket title "Super Sentai" and then re-dubbed into English and spliced in between footage of American actors to make a brand new show. The second season of Power Rangers borrowed most of its footage from "Gosei Sentai Dairanger," which was recently released to the American public on DVD with English subtitles. I was good enough this year for Santa to bring it to me on Christmas, so I've been delving deep into its wacky antics. The two shows have almost nothing in common aside from the shared footage, especially in their personification of the White Ranger. Instead of fan-favorite, camera-mugging spotlight-stealer Tommy, the equivalent Kiba Ranger is a 9 year-old pervert who has a penchant for looking up skirts and touching the Pink Ranger's breasts. But on to the main event: This gravestone's true name is "President Gravestone," and he is a member of "The Three Stooges," a trio of monsters who are too weird to even fight properly. Inside his tombstone head, there is a video-telephone and a fortune-telling machine. In the episode this trio featured in, they kidnapped the Japanese Red Ranger's sister, and forced the team into a game of deadly soccer to decide her fate. Naturally, the Dairangers won and the "Three Stooges" got the tar beaten out of them. At the end, they marched into the sunset, cursing it and tripping over themselves. I still have no idea what the gravestone says. ..... And this didn't even happen: So... I guess that's that? Maybe he'll show up again later, as he and his crew were not destroyed. Here's to hoping that they do.... and that they finally explain what is going on with that epitaph. Also, sidenote: This guy, who also made an unusual appearance in that Halloween episode, is named "Key Jester," and he caused trouble in Dairanger by stealing people's souls. Interestingly, the footage they used of him in America was moments before his demise. He's tricked into opening a fake door that explodes in Japan, while in America, he's just opening a door to whatever wacky dimension that our lord and savior Tommy is sent to. Only time will tell if the most prominent of my burning questions will be answered... but I won't hold my breath. |
The MASTER OF THE CASTLEJoseph Walter is a 2013 graduate of Drexel University, with a degree in Film & Video and a minor in Film Studies. Archives
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